|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
 Tom Johansmeyer
Tom Johansmeyer is a freelance writer based in Manhattan. Tom has written for a number of national and international publications on business, opinion and lifestyle topics. Tom has a BA in Philosophy from Ripon College and a MBA from Suffolk University.
|
|
|
Karl Rove to Join Ice Capades
Bush's (former) Brain has resurfaced. The longtime friend and ally of the president, affectionately called "Turd Blossom", is rumored to have signed a contract with the popular touring ice dancing show, the Ice Capades. While details of the agreement are being guarded closely by both parties, those close to the deal say that it is "big money".
One White House employee, who prefers to remain anonymous, claims, "I've seen the contract. Let's just say that Karl Rove isn't a civil servant any more - and he doesn't miss it.
After leaving the White House, it can be difficult to find a job with the same challenges. So, most elect to take cushy private sector jobs with fat paychecks for little work. Private equity and law have always been at the top of the list for fleeing Executive Branch staffers. Few have ventured into the performing arts, though.
Rove's post-White House career comes as a shock to many, as the consensus guess seemed to be the bland write-a-book-and-lecture route. With Rove's decades beside the current president, it looked like the logical next step.
"Oh come on," former Secretary of State Colin Powell remarked. "You know Rove has more style than that." Powell took a deep breath and continued, "I mean, I never liked the guy. Not at all. But, still. When you see a certain panache, you can't ignore it. I knew Karl would do something crazy."
While spokesmen for the Ice Capades did not reply to repeated phone calls, entertainment critics and reporters around the country have high hopes for the new performer. Ken Wall, an editor at the Times Herald Record in Middletown, NY has already secured tickets to the Madison Square Garden stop on the tour.
"Here's a man who is obviously comfortable on thin ice," Wall said of Rove. "The Ice Capades are a natural fit!" Wall chuckled briefly. "And he has moves … the way he danced around immigration reform and Social Security privatization - remarkable. Gliding gracefully across the rink will be easy."
While Turd Blossom's unusual career choice has been described in many ways, nobody has called it undignified. Psychologist Peggy Sylvester explains that Rove needed a new outlet for his creative energy. "His whole life," according to Sylvester, "has been about policy and electoral strategy. There's nothing more he can do in that space." She says that a mind like Rove's is wired to create and desperately craves attention. "For Karl, the applause will be the ultimate high. He will be rewarded immediately for his great work."
Details pertaining to Rove's role in the show have been kept a secret, but Rove sightings around Manhattan's East Village make fans hopeful. Last week, Rove is said to have walked out of a small boutique, bags held close. A tourist from Iowa thinks he saw an animal print, though, "Probably leopard."
|
|
|
|
|
|
Stay informed with Krotchett!
Get on the List!
|
|
